January 15th Because

Denial. I am in denial of thinking I will ever hike the trail.  I did try to take a small step today in getting the house more ready by trying to clean the side yard up a bit.  The ground is too frozen.  Last time I tried it was too wet.
I had a meeting this afternoon for an upcoming SCA event.  I found myself getting stressed over the small conversations about whether to do things one way or another and things that normally would not have stressed me like that.  It was a different type of stress.  I went there looking forward to seeing people and in the end, I realized that I was a little overwhelmed.  There were only about 20 or so people.  I haven't even entered the woods and I am already prepared to be mostly alone?  I am not sure if I should classify this as a good thing or not.  If a room with 20 people is suddenly feeling a little overwhelming, what will I do at the event in 2 weeks where we could see 2000?  Today I colored.  😊

A year or 2 ago I printed out the below and had my daughter fill it out with me (I was driving):

This has been tacked to my wall for quite some time but I never look at it.  As I sat down tonight in this state of denial I thought about it.  Perhaps I should read it more often.  Not once did I answer because I enjoy being completely by myself for extended periods of time.  Ideally, my son will be with me most of the journey.  When I say with me, I figure we will meet up on a daily basis, share parts of the trail and wander separately as well.  He has other commitments for part of the summer too.
There is also 'When I successfully thru-hike the Appalachian Trail I will...'  and 'If I give up on the Appalachian Trail I will...' that I may share another time.


Today my happy things are dinner out with a dear friend after the meeting-she loved the penguin socks, and coloring.  I also got a gift from friends that is a calendar to color.
And speaking of socks, my emoji socks are another happy for today.  😎